My mate Jeff
I've known him for years
He loves his Madonna
and his Britney Spears
But then one day
I noticed a change
He went all moody
and he didn't look the same
His eyes looked black
I said have you got a shiner?
When I looked closer
he were wearing eyeliner
He'd straightened 'is hair
and combed it ovver 'is eyes
And all at once I realised…

Oh, no
He's turned Emo
He's dressing like a goth
And he's let himself go
He used to be listening to Simply Red
now he's listening to Fall Out Boy instead

Well he weren't at the Labour Club
for our regular line dance
He just stayed at home
and listened to My Chemical Romance
I said you're not an emo
lets forget this misdemeanour
Come wi me and see
Cliff Richard at the MEN arena
He said "I'm feeling all emotional
I don't know why"
I said its those tight trousers
that are making you cry
Come an have a pint a mild
And you'll feel fine
And listen to Abba
Not Bullet for My Valentine

Oh, no
He's turned Emo
He's dressing like a goth
And he's let himself go
He used to be listening to Simply Red
now he's listening to Fall Out Boy instead

Well I saw him yesterday
When I were walking to tha station
I could tell from a distance
he were wearing foundation
He paints his fingernails black
An It looks quite poor
It looks like he's caught his fingers
in a car door
He were wearing a man bag
that said 'Jimmy Eat World'
I said thas wants fert eat
a chippy tea
ya great big blummin girl
He said "I just want my emotions to be exposed"
Emotions? Thas from Lancashire, thas not got none of those!

Oh, no
He's turned Emo
He's dressing like a goth
And he's let himself go
He used to be listening to Simply Red
now he's listening to Fall Out Boy instead