Chords used:
   E  B  E7  E7/G#  A  B7/A
E|-0--2--0-----0----0---2---|
B|-0--4--0-----0----2---4---|
G|-1--4--1-----1----2---4---|
D|-2--4--0-----0----2---4---|
A|-2--2--2-----2----0---0---|
E|-0-----0-----4------------|


[Verse 1]
   E                                                   B
Immanuel Kant was a real pissant who was very rarely stable
                                                                       E
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table
                             E7      E7/G#     A
David Hume could out-consume Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel
    B                                              B7/A         E
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine who was just as schloshed as Schlegel
                B
There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya 'bout the raising of the wrist
E            E7/G      C#7         F#7
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed

[Verse 2]
E                                                                       B
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will on half a pint of shandy was particularly ill
                                                              E
Plato, they say, could stick it away: half a crate of whiskey every day
                                                     E7         E7/G#       A
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle and Hobbes was fond of his dram
    B                                                B7/A   E
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart "I drink, therefore I am."
                 E7          E7/G#    B
Yes, Socrates himself is particularly pissed
                               B7/A   B    B7/A  E
A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed