[Intro] Em  B
        Em  B  C  B7 

Em           B              C      B7
Give us this day our daily dose of faux affliction
Em    
Forgive our sins forged at the pulpit
C                      B7
With forked tongues selling faux sermons
   Em         B               C
'cause I am a new wave gospel sharp
           B7
And you'll be thy witness
    Em                  B
So gentlemen, if you're gonna preach
    C                                B7
For God sakes preach with conviction

Em
Strike up the band
Oh, the conductor is beckoning
B
Come, congregation, and let's sing it like you mean it
   C 
No, don't you get it, don't you get it, now
          B7
Don't you move
              Em
Strike up the band
Oh, the conductor is beckoning
B 
Come, congregation, and let's sing it like you mean it
  C
No, don't you get it, don't you get it now
          B7
Don't you move

     Em
Just stay where I can see you
Douse the lights

B                             Em
We sure are in for a show tonight

Em                           B                  C              B7
In this little number we are graced by two displays of character
              Em              B
We've got the gunslinger extraordinaire
C               B7
Walking contradiction
    Em              B                   C
And I for one can see no blood from the hearts
                    B7
And the wrists you allegedly slit
    Em               B 
And I for one won't stand for this
        C                                        B7
If this scene were a parish you'd all be condemned

Em
Strike up the band
Oh, the conductor is beckoning
B
Come, congregation, and let's sing it like you mean it
   C 
No, don't you get it, don't you get it, now
          B7
Don't you move
              Em
Strike up the band
Oh, the conductor is beckoning
B 
Come, congregation, and let's sing it like you mean it
  C
No, don't you get it, don't you get it now
          B7
Don't you move

     Am     
Just stay where I can see you
          Em   B
Douse the lights

B7                               Em  B  C
We sure are in for a show tonight
Am        
Stay where I can see you
          Em    B
Douse the lights
B7
We sure are in
Em         B     C    
Stay where I can see you
          B7
Douse the lights

( Em  B  C  B7 )

La da da da da da da

B7            Em
Strike up the band
Oh, the conductor is beckoning
B
Come, congregation, and let's sing it like you mean it
C
No, don't you get it, don't you get it now
          B7
Don't you move
              Em
Strike up the band
Oh, the conductor is beckoning
B
Come, congregation, and let's sing it like you mean it
C
No, don't you get it, don't you get it now
          B7
Don't you move
Don't you move

( Em  B  C  B7 )

Don't you move
              Em
Strike up the band