1. Telephone my baby get a date for Saturday night
Got some money in my wallet, hair slicked up just right
Hang on a minute, these here pants is too tight!

I used to be a 34 now I's a 38
Walk up to my baby's door, skinny Jim, lookin great
Hang on a minute this here cat's put on weight!

c) This cat's too fat
Hey diddle diddle
This cat's too fat
Put on weight round the middle
This cat's too fat
Look at the state l'm in!
This cat's too fat
I got a double chin!
I better find myself a double mat
This cat's too fat!

2. Now l like my wine and whisky, like my coffee laced
l-Talian cookin' is the stuff l love to taste
All this fine livin's done gone right to my waist!

I guess it's true, a few pounds I could lose,
Cut out the whiskey, cut down on the booze
Pretty soon th'only thing left I goin't fit's my shoes!
3. My baby says she likes it, truth be told
Says them skinny boys just leave her cold
She loves them andles l got there to hold!

c) This cat's too fat
Hey diddle diddle
This cat's too fat
Put on weight round the middle
This cat's too fat
Look at the state I'm in!
This cat's too fat
I got a double chin!
l better find my self a double mat
This cat too fat!