Well I guess I messed things up again

I got caught in a landslide and my phone died
And the weather added context
I swear that I just cried for a week about the sun
I came to all the conclusions
Of how I'm losing
Every single thing I am
Had every plan of not moving from my bed ever again

But I got scared of everything

Well I guess I messed things up again
Maybe all I'll ever be
Is just a self fulfilling prophecy of all the worries inside me
Well I guess I messed things up again
Is this all I'll ever be?
I was trying to be a better person but I'm weak, I'm weak, I'm weak

I've gotten better at losing and it's using
Every single bone I have
To be the one that's refusing to give up on everything
They told me things would get better
Like the weather
But I'm still waiting for that cold to fade from November
Maybe I should let it go

I already melt at everything

Well I guess I messed things up again
Maybe all I'll ever be
Is just a self fulfilling prophecy of all the worries inside me
Well I guess I messed things up again
Is this all I'll ever be?
I was trying to be a better person but I'm weak, I'm weak, I'm weak

All these moods like English weather
Are never getting better
I might stay inside forever
Where at least I know it's warm