I surrender

My fingers reach out trembling
I try so desperately to touch you
As the blood seeps from your eyes
Spilling on to these cold hands

The crimson stains far beyond my human embodiment
Outside unscathed
Inside torn completely
More baggage I must carry the weight
Pummeling

I stab myself with questions over and over
Command me I surrender
I am yours

I no longer sleep
Kept awake for my selfish crimes
Living out this life sentence
Forced to view each and every frame of the picture
Eternally looped
Constantly rewound and played
Eternally looped

Cradled by the guilt
I lay twitching, convulsing
Still she watches enchanted by it
She drools at the pain she inflicts

You fade from my grasp
But I am still drawn forward
The flames flicker
I swallow to keep them down
It singes my tongue and blisters my throat
It tares at me
I give up
I surrender
Let someone else go through this Hell
I quit