If I can get this hanger through the window of my car I'll never leave my house again for anything, I swear Pacing in the driveway, I'm the nemesis of fun With soggy hot dog buns from spilling warm beer in my trunk Throwing down my jacket as I walk inside I send a cloudy CD case flying off the side Of a dresser from ikea that I can't get right (God, I swear it's missing pieces; I could choke someone) I guess you can come over if you're really dry But I'm not really trying to go out tonight It's been a really shitty day, I'd rather take some time To just pound zinfandel by myself and unwind Remind me of the last time that we hung out, was it sick? 'Cause I don't remember anything, not a glimpse of it And I would rather re-up than hear about your kids But I hope that y'all are doing Just as great as I expect you're doing P got me some gifts because she's super tight I'm lighterless, relying on the stove for a light But I don't really care, these are my favorite nights (When I can sit on my ass and respond to no one) I guess you can come over if you're really dry But I'm not really trying to go out tonight No, with my clammy fingers grabbing every crumb that I find I could sit around here for the rest of my life If I can get this hanger through the window of my car I'll never leave my house again for anything, I swear Pacing in the driveway, I'm the nemesis of fun With soggy hot dog buns from spilling warm beer in my trunk