Well, I start runnin' a fever
Every time he opens his mouth
She's been gawkin' at Jackson
Ever since his first song came out

Oh, she loves Alan Jackson
And his pretty blonde hair

Oh, I love Alan Jackson

I ain't got a prayer

Well, he tried dressin' like Jackson

Belt buckles, boots, and a hat
She said,
"Sorry hon, that won't help you none
Because you're just too dang fat."

Oh, I hate Alan Jackson
She sleeps with a piece of his coat

Oh, I love Alan Jackson

'Cause of them songs he wrote

Well, I went backstage at his concert
I got on his bus somehow

That big talkin' man and his little five piece band
Just taught her what I didn't know how
Gosh, I hate Alan Jackson

Now I'm his openin' act
Oh, I love Alan Jackson

She's never comin' back
...She loves you man!

Oh, I start runnin' a fever
Every time he opens his mouth
She's been gawkin' at Jackson
Ever since his first song came out
Oh, she loves Alan Jackson
Makes me want to cuss

(Ha!) Oh, he hates Alan Jackson

Think I'll blow up his bus

Yeah,
Someday I'll Rock His Jukebox!

No You're not!

Ha! Might hit him with a Tall, Tall, Tree!

Well, he just might hit you back!

Well, I tell you what!
I'll show him The Real World!
He'll think Real World when they find him way down yonder in the bottom of the Chattahoochie!

Oh yeah! He just might run ya over with his Mercury!

I tell ya what, tell him to meet me somewhere!

Hey Hoss, meet him at Midnight In Montgomery!

Wanted, my life back!

Who Says You Can't Have It All?

Alan Jackson.